I remember when I only wanted female OB-GYNs. I remember when I met my doctors before they probed me. These complaints aside i think i would lose my mind if not for the nurses. I am being followed at Cornell Weill Medical Center and they are a well oiled machine. I even have a swipey card that registers my arrival so i don't have to talk to anyone when i check in. How many of you have doctor's that let you do that?
And today one of the women who coordinates research called me a "spring chicken" i think it was a compliment but in the world of inferitlity if you're young and you are undergoing ivf (especially if you have a child) you're looked at kind of selfish and maybe even a little rude.
Even so, we begin IVF today. The hormones begin today and I prepare to lose my mind once again. I know people say the devil you know is better than the devil you don't but somehow knowing i am going to go insane is more disturbing than when losing my mind surprised me the first time around.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Monday, January 12, 2009
if it takes a village to raise a child it takes a city to get a woman through infertility
When I think about all the people I yelled, cried or sneered at during my last IUI attempt when the hormone levels were really high I am amazed that people still talk to me. I can't figure out if I should warn people ahead of time that I'm going to turn into Mr. Hyde again or if I should let them figure it out when I lose my mind over the salad bar running out of peppers.
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
ivfu- an origin story
The name of this blog is literal it's a big F&#^k you to IVF.
I guess, to be fair, it's an fu to needing IVF i'm glad IVF exists because i need it.
My husband and i are blessed with a beautiful son. He is almost 3 and he is wonderful. Getting pregnant with him wasn't simple (it took many months) but it was uneventful (oh, except for accidentally taking an abortive when i was 2 months pregnant- but that's a story for another time). Anyway, ideally we wanted our kids spaced out around 21/2 years so we started trying to get pregnant last august (2007). I hate to ruin the ending for you but we're not pregnant yet.
Since trying last august i had a miscarriage that turned out to be an anovulaic cycle (that means i wasn't ovulating) they look and feel the same but, evidently, the former means you can get pregnant and the second means there's trouble. They did some looking around and found a dermoid tumor (they say cyst to make you feel better but it's a tumor). they took it out in april of 08 it's benign but the recovery sucked and it delayed our first IUI for many months. In june we did our first iui blah blah blah we've done five iui's they evolved from just chlomid (minimal, meds by mouth) to 275mg. of hormones (injection and they made me a little insane). Nothing happened- my ovary that had the cyst isn't working so we start IVF later this month.
I guess, to be fair, it's an fu to needing IVF i'm glad IVF exists because i need it.
My husband and i are blessed with a beautiful son. He is almost 3 and he is wonderful. Getting pregnant with him wasn't simple (it took many months) but it was uneventful (oh, except for accidentally taking an abortive when i was 2 months pregnant- but that's a story for another time). Anyway, ideally we wanted our kids spaced out around 21/2 years so we started trying to get pregnant last august (2007). I hate to ruin the ending for you but we're not pregnant yet.
Since trying last august i had a miscarriage that turned out to be an anovulaic cycle (that means i wasn't ovulating) they look and feel the same but, evidently, the former means you can get pregnant and the second means there's trouble. They did some looking around and found a dermoid tumor (they say cyst to make you feel better but it's a tumor). they took it out in april of 08 it's benign but the recovery sucked and it delayed our first IUI for many months. In june we did our first iui blah blah blah we've done five iui's they evolved from just chlomid (minimal, meds by mouth) to 275mg. of hormones (injection and they made me a little insane). Nothing happened- my ovary that had the cyst isn't working so we start IVF later this month.
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